Home Opinion Moana Cried For Help Too Many Times But No-One Listened!

Moana Cried For Help Too Many Times But No-One Listened!

Moana Cried For Help Too Many Times But No-One Listened!

. . .Opinion

You may know someone who is frustrated, but you don’t know their frustration. People expect depressed people to cry a lot, stay in bed all day, shuffling their feet, or sound like Winnie the Pooh’s voice like Eeyore. But depression is not always so obvious.

If Michell Mimmie ‘Moana’ Amuli’s videos on Instagram are to go by then we might all had turned a blind eye on the late fitness bunnie.

Some people can totally fake it. They can smile and laugh; they can act like everyone else, even while they are in excruciating emotional pain. Occasionally people who can do this end up killing themselves, and no one can believe it.

Despite being killed in an accident, I personally believe Moana was living a ‘troubled private life’.

Some people can totally fake it. They can smile and laugh; they can act like everyone else, even while they are in excruciating emotional pain. Occasionally people who can do this end up killing themselves, and no one can believe it.

People who are depressed but act like they are fine may not confide in anyone. Usually they find a way to spend time alone crying or letting down the façade and then go back to acting when they have to be with people.

On top of the pain they already feel, acting happy is emotionally exhausting, and having this secret is isolating. So, faking it can even increase the depression.

Others funnel their pain into anger and people see them rage, abuse, shame, or react with annoyance or irritation to whatever happens around them. They may or may not themselves know they’re depressed, but others often don’t guess how much devastating emotional pain they are in.

People may fear them, despise them, or dismiss them as mean. It is very difficult to feel sympathy for someone who is hurting people, and it is difficult to see their vulnerability, so their depression goes unnoticed.

While we were busy concentrating on her beauty and party lifestyle we might have missed her cry for help.

The pain is also complicated by the fact that depression attacks a person’s thoughts and feelings, rather than liver or lungs. Depression can cause a person to think she hates herself or is unhappy in her relationships. It can cause someone to believe everyone would be better off without him, or even that others would be better off dead. It can cause people to feel sad, angry, guilty, numb, or rageful, even when none of this is how they feel when they aren’t depressed.

I don’t know your situation. But I know what rejection is like and I know what it’s like to be isolated and alone. The best thing I can tell you is to keep telling yourself sometimes minute by minute that what you are experiencing will pass. What I went through was brutal, I won’t go into the whole thing, but my car had been stolen, bank account drained, and I was left with no transportation, no money – no way to communicate (my phone was stolen) – I felt utterly powerless. This is what was intended.

How can anyone who hasn’t experienced it understand the complexity of pain that is not only unbearably intense itself but also complicated by many painful factors like the stigma of mental illness and the confusion of the fact that unlike other illnesses, depression causes behavior changes.

People attribute behavior to the moral character of the person, rather than to the illness.

So what can you do to help people you love who are depressed, if you can’t tell they’re depressed? Ask questions very kindly and listen to the answers very carefully. Empathize with their emotional pain—even if you have to guess at what it might be.

Let them know you are there to listen and understand for as long as it takes, and you aren’t taking no for an answer. Of course if you aren’t trustworthy—if you judge them, or talk to others about what they tell you, or interrupt, get impatient, or misunderstand them, then it is better for them to talk to someone who can really listen without any of this. Being a reliable, trustworthy, patient, nonjudgmental listener is the best thing you can do in most cases with someone who is depressed.

A couple of caveats: I am talking about adults—children and teens require some variations. Also, addictions cloud the picture of depression and require their own, very different intervention.

Nonjudgmental listening is still essential but may need to be combined with some firm boundary-setting and professional treatment for the addiction.

The preceding article was solely written by the author named above. Any views and opinions expressed are not necessarily shared by zimetro.co.zw – Questions or concerns about the preceding article can be directed to the author or posted as a comment.

Source | ZiMetro News

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